( Emma Swan. Bellamy and her do share. He pushes away a decidedly NSFW thought about sharing as he opens the conversation and taps a finger to the message box. )
I never shared this much with my ex. Did he tell you we drank together? He's not a very good influence, Emma.
( Jackson bets it won't be the only. Not something he should be thinking about. Emma you found yourself a piece. )
I'm not. I tend to BE the role model.
Ethan is only an ex because he's not here. I'm not delusional enough to keep hope alive, and I don't wish this on anyone. Before coming here, we were in danger. I know we got through it. But, that doesn't matter because it's not me. I'm here. Meeting your not-ex, who, is very inspirational.
Fine. Then he's my not-ex. I can consider our relationship on hold.
So, the straights are co-opting queer language here, too. Good to know things are consistent across all realms.
( He's actually being cheeky, which means that for all intents and purposes he likes Emma and Bellamy. Or, at the very least he can stand them. Maybe he'll gain respect for them.
But he can't help how Emma will take it and he's not about to preface anything after the fact. Or, justify. He said what he said. Dealwithit.gif. )
[ she has to laugh at his point and his assumption. this city's a nightmare, but she's found herself drawn to a lot of people here, and she's never bothered to worry about anything beyond it feeling right.]
Bellamy's from space, our timelines couldn't be much farther apart. We'll only have this here.
Aliens could smell human. I wouldn't know. Aliens are capable of a lot. They're. Aliens.
( Can't they look like humans when they want? Don't they? )
He wins for most insane story. Does he have radiation poisoning? He's not dying, is he
( The funny thing is, he's not concerned. He just wants to know if he shouldn't drink in proximity to the dying man from space. Space cancer is probably ten times worse than Earth cancer. Maybe even dangerous to werewolves. )
I wasn't upset, I was livid. This place took away my choice. It's something I have history with and I did not leave Beacon Hills behind to become yet another master's lizard sock puppet.
Your door's fine. Bellamy made a crack about coming inside before I break it down. And billing me. I may have used excessive force when I knocked.
Lucky me, my bite triggered something else first. No, you don't get the long story, yes I'm both. I can change at will. I have an entire spiel usually when I explain it but I'm too tired right now. And what I really am isn't common knowledge.
No. I don't know that. Tell me again how you didn't capture all of us and your life partner. Please.
( He knows firsthand how rare it is for anger to dissipate. )
I know.
Is this where you say, that's why we all need to stick together? I've never braided friendship bracelets before, they tend to clash with more expensive accessories.
Also, you heard about people running into people they knew before?
[Because dammit, he doesn't like thinking about Jesse Manes showing up in this place. And ignoring the twinges when he thinks about this Ethan showing up because, in the end, he hopes he does for Jackson's sake but not the happiest of thoughts either. ]
Not only running into people they know, but people being here before and then gone now. The werewolf I made bite me, Derek, he was here before. I think he slept with the same guy I did.
Maybe you should sterilize less medical equipment and focus on your own. At least more than once every two weeks. Or, I could find an alpha, kill him, and then turn you. Solve all of your problems. Offer's on the table. Just saying.
( He feels comfortable around Kyle, and when texting him. They don't always see one another, or always talk and they've yet to go on a real date even though they agreed they both - wanted to - but still, this message makes him smile. )
I liked going to the gym after nine. You weed out the freaks and the lurkers.
Worse things that could happen than a shared partner. Found out in bad ways that someone I've known since we were practically in diapers is here. Got to tell him his dad shot me.
[ Which was easier than what happened later. He's still not sure what to make of that, except to chalk it up to charms and pretend it never, ever happened. Not entirely mature but better than trying to work out what happened with Manes and his dominant. ]
Where's the sympathy? I'm trying to stay in shape for the sake of others, thank you very little.
If you're going to be a tease, there should be more nudity involved. Always thought werewolf was better than vampires in that whole eternal war thing anyways.
All of them? Which ones? Asks the quarterback that went to Michigan on a football scholarship.
Yeah. I think I am. Maybe. Alex and I were working together against his dad before the shooting. A lot of it is more him not knowing I'm bi since I tortured him in high school because I was afraid and finding out when I hit on him.
Not quite. I've known since I ran out on a game of spin the bottle calling him every name in the book. That was the end of our friendship until about six months ago.
He found out here when I hit on him, and schooled me on why being in the closet and being homophobic because of it is bad. In fairness, I've had months to tell him before we even ended up here, and I was scared.
[ He's kind of glad to be talking about this in text, because in that he's still a bit weak about this, and he's glad not to see Jackson's face knowing the horrible person he's been. ]
You randomly hit on him here, in a place like this. Out of nowhere. You had months, but really, you had years. Except, you were afraid.
I was unaware. My one goal was always being the best. I was the best student, the best athlete. The best boyfriend. Except, I was a shitty boyfriend and I only had Lydia because it meant I had a girlfriend. She's brilliant, even to this day, and I recognized it. I think a part of me cared about her, but there was a bigger part of me that cared about winning and getting better. It was only after I stepped back, moved away from everything I knew, and went into mandatory therapy that I started seeing that.
I was mean, but I was also cruel. I had one friend, who I think just liked me because we'd always been friends.
Look, I don't usually say all this crap, but I want you to see that being a bully, or shooting your shot in a fucked up city, it happens. You're not alone here.
Fucked up as it is, I'm glad I'm not alone in this. Coming back to Roswell, I've blamed myself for a lot, and much as I can justify the fear, I hate that I tried to destroy him just so his dad wouldn't destroy me.
He beat him all the time for being gay, and I was scared he'd hit me too. Not that I never put it together my dad, the sheriff, knew it was happening and rather then save Alex just let it happen. Got him killed, though guess it just would have been sooner otherwise.
I think I loved my girlfriend back then, and she's a friend again now, but I know part of it then was she was the smartest girl in school. Now she's going to end up with the soulful literature loving cowboy. Can you hear eyerolling in text?
Thanks though for not just telling me I'm not alone.
[ He would have believed Jackson if he had just said it but it means a lot to Kyle that he opened up like that. ]
This place is a lot of it, but not just because of what it is. It's easier when it's not that town. I hadn't realized how much I've been withdrawing about who I am while coping with everything going on. It felt easy to just be myself here and now I feel on guard again.
Ignoring everything you're saying just to say that Varsity Blues is not a good sports movie, or a good movie. All it has is James Van Der Beek and Tara Reid, but I like my women smart and James Van Der Beek older. He aged well. Better than the Dawson's Creek years.
Now that I've said that, I'm going to catch up. Being here is fucked up, and how you treated Alex, and how his father treated him, and how you two treated each other, it's all fucked up. All of it. Maybe it's easier when you leave everything you know behind. All you have is you and everything else. In London, I was Jackson Whittemore, guy from California. Not Jackson Whittemore, perfectionist or Jackson Whittemore, unwilling murderer. Just, Jackson Whittemore. In Beacon Hills I wore my last name with pride. In London, it mattered to me less.
What I hate about being here is being uprooted from a life I made myself against my will. That guard I dropped is up again. And not just because of the charms. Because, for the first time in two years, I'm unsure again.
Some footnotes. I thought I was the only one who could effectively eye roll through text. It's always the soulful, nice ones who seem to get the girl, but I didn't make an effort to get any girl. Or, guy for that matter for a long time. And I know about loving the smartest girl in school, probably in California. She's one of my best friends.
I hope you appreciate all these texts, I don't send shit like this. But, you sound like you need to read it. So. Read it. But don't weep, I don't know if these devices are waterproof.
[ It may be the dumbest thing in the world, but Kyle is having more fun than he should be with the movie talk, imagining the look on Jackson's face with each movie he throws out.]
So assuming we're not including The Waterboy. What about Any Given Sunday? Can't argue Van Der Beek.
[ Don't trust the B James, definitely. ]
We both changed our lives, and that was our choice. This is having that ripped away and pushed into rolls we might not want. Not the same thing as leaving behind the golden child of a town for the man we want to be. Just like it was easier just being me here before I had a reason to remember the asshole I was.
[And maybe he shouldn't just forget like that, but he'd also like to hope they can get to a point where Alex isn't just punching Kyle when he sees him unless a charm is involved. God, he'd really like to stop being hit by Alex Manes.
Or end up in bed with him and another because of the charms. For Kyle that introduction to this place has been harder than he might have thought. It makes him question what's him, and what he's becoming. The only time he doesn't is when he's with Jackson. Then it just feels natural.]
Though here's my closest to weepy you're going to get even with opening up, and thank you for that. I appreciate it. I'm glad I've got someone here I can have these talks with, and mock mercilessly for his dead wolf coat, and get through this with.
I was always thankful growing up to be one state to the west of Texas when I saw that movie.
Damien? Really?
It snows here? I think I'm going to try and lure you out in the moonlight in that coat and a pair of jeans for another photoshoot. Since you have the camera and all.
There's this pattern where I meet someone you know, or you're vaguely connected to, and then you reach out and you tell me. Was there a memory loss component in being brought here, or are you just overly worried? We can start to keep a record. Can these take screenshots.
( Emma gets his default setting, but always with a twist of genuine appreciation. If he goes off like this, if he types more than one sentence, he must care. )
I like her. She's a straight shooter. I sound like my dad.
You wouldn't believe how many sets of memories are in my head, anyway.
[ he thinks he's funny. her memory is fine, miraculously, after all she's been through. but the reality is that the memory thing happens a lot where she's from.]
I like her too, it's been a long time since Bellamy's had her in his life. I think he's still processing everything.
[ he's probably heard her refer to Bellamy as Starshine, even if she was saying it quietly. his nickname for her is Princess, and in some ways that's relevant, too.]
( He was just there, earlier, but it sounds like Octavia is out, too. It's a bitch going back and forth and back, but eventually he'll invite people to a place he buys. Or, rents. He needs to research a lot here. He's only 19, but sure, real estate should be researched. She says, 'Come to the house' and he takes that literally.
As in, now. As in werewolf speed at her door, and probably the most gingerly knock he's ever given. )
[ at this point, they might as well make him his own key. they'll probably make one for Octavia anyway.
- wait, no. that's dangerous. that's the death of privacy and the potential for disaster all rolled into one. maybe she should just be glad he's learning how to knock without taking the door off. either way, he doesn't have to wait long before she pulls it open.] Hey, come in. [ she steps aside, closing the door behind her, and whether he wants it or not, there's cocoa on the coffee table.]
( She really likes her cocoa, which is his thought as he strides in past her, electricity coursing through his knuckles. He flexes his fingers, having held this in for longer than he'd intended. It's a journey going from the person who tells people nothing and the person who knows he had to find someone to tell everyone. It looks like Emma is his Ethan. He turns back, trying to decide how he's going to describe it. )
Derek's here. Again. He was here before, but he's here - now. Today. And yesterday.
[ it's not easy, going from keeping things bottled up to allowing yourself to confide in another person. Emma understands that better than Jackson might realize, which is why she's quick to settle down on the couch and to offer him the seat beside her. if he needs to talk, she's more than willing to listen.]
They sent him home and brought him back? It happens. It just - let's rewind, what does it mean for you?
I don't care about what he wants. What do you want?
[ once they figure that out, they can work from there. but the other guy doesn't get priority just because he's expecting something from Jackson. it doesn't work that way for her.]
I don't know. I don't want to be under anyone's thumb, but being a lone Beta isn't safe. Being Pack means he'd watch my back. Pack is like family.
( He stops short of giving her the entire rundown. Family is something he has back home and he's gotten better at recognizing it and maintaining it. But, family also implies trust and he's not sure he trusts Derek. He fucked up his first time he made Betas. And two out of the four of them died. But there isn't an alpha pack here and -- well, he's dating a former member. He's not usually in his head but it's complicated and that's what his eyes convey, too. )
[ look, she understands that being a werelizard where he's from is different than what she's seen Ruby go through. she isn't going to claim to understand most of it, but doing it because he feels he's without other options isn't the best reason to trust someone. in her opinion, it's one of the worst.
he could probably dig a little deeper than that. it's practical, and he doesn't know all the ways she could protect him - but she would, without hesitation. without him needing to feel like he's under someone's thumb.]
( There's also the hand job. And the chemistry he didn't expect. )
It's worth considering.
( He thinks. )
He wasn't - when he first bit me - I made him. I told you the bite affected me differently. Derek and his betas hunted me. Derek and his brother killed me.
[ to be fair, Regina's tried to kill her before, too. but it's different, being the person who was targeted and hearing about it from someone else - someone who's just a kid himself. she doesn't like where this is going.]
They had to. I was going to transform into something worse, and I may never have returned.
( But they still killed him. )
I rose up a full-werewolf after, and I reluctantly let Derek teach me 'how to werewolf' before I moved. ( And he was stubborn, and had compartmentalized everything. ) What happened to me isn't his fault.
Emma, I don't have anyone here. Not like Ethan. Ethan was more than a boyfriend. He was Pack. You and Bellamy, you're nice and I let you treat me like this kid brother but I'm not your family.
( With Kyle it's all too close. It burned brightly, but it's hard. Hard to maintain and to keep and to let go. )
she tenses visibly at the explanation, nodding her understanding since words would either come out defensive or hurt, and that's more vulnerability than she's willing to let anyone see when he's already shut her down. but after a moment, after seemingly let the words sink in, she continues.
I don't know if it's best for me, or if it's going to take me back to a darker place I left behind.
( He's not lost to her reaction. He's not heartless. He doesn't mean to hurt her. None of this is about her, or about Bellamy. How does he come out and say that they are like his family. That they've become like his family. That he cares. )
I don't know anything here. I haven't fulfilled my contract, any contract, only my quota. And that's with someone who could get me arrested. I - I don't know how to do any of this, Emma. You - you are, okay. You're like family, but if I let myself think of you like family -- I'm not always a good person. ( He's spiraling as he tries to come up with the proper words. ) I need to get a better - foothold. I need -- ( He just shakes his head slowly, back and forth, not really knowing what it is he needs. Or what he needs to say, or what he can say. )
You think I'm always a good person? Jackson, when I was your age, I was just released from prison.
[ it's a long, painful story. more importantly, it's hers, when she thinks they need to focus on what he's going through right now. but the point stands - whatever they've offered him, it isn't dependent on him being a good person. she and Bellamy have both had moments where they were anything but.]
You have time to find a contract, and as far as quota - is this a designation thing?
When Bellamy and I contracted, I had a thing going with another dominant. We were pretty public about it, and aside from a few disapproving stares, no one ever stepped in.
[ maybe it's more than he wanted to know, but it shows what the city prioritizes here.]
It's okay. [ and it is. it would be even if he meant what he said. he's not obligated to care about her just because she decided to care about him. everyone's just trying to get by here.]
I know that sometimes when people reach out, it's not what you want, or what you can handle.
You'll get your shit together. Just try to remember, you have people. You don't need this guy. And if you join his pack, if you decide that's what's best for you...don't do it because you have to.
You wouldn't happen to have a break in your studies to grab a drink sometime, would you?
[ It's a casual text in Kyle's mind... that took him too long to compose. He spent too long thinking he could just go for a run, to grab another shift at Haven. Anything to ignore the way his mind keeps going back to the things he's done here that he's not comfortable with, and fearing he's going to have to embrace whether he likes it or not. ]
( He's been there, too, and quiet, which he does feel guilty about, for those he cares for. But, Kyle is one person he was honest with when he decided to pull back, study and ignore shit that's happened. Not, the ignore shit - that he only told Emma. But, the studying, the getting away from it all. He hopes Kyle didn't take it personally. But, considering Kyle's reached out, and caught him on a good day... Emma smacked some sense into him, he actually answers the text when he gets it. )
The great thing about studying the way I want to, I take the breaks I want to. I saw a bar by your hospital. Is it presumptuous to think you've been there before? I could meet you after/before your shift. Admitting that I haven't been tracking your schedule like before.
Not tracking. Been as aware.
You know what I mean.
( Underneath the forbidden part of their friendship, or their dating that was put on pause, is a genuine guy who seems in over his head, but Jackson's no different. He'd been consulting with a lawyer, and he's talked to Emma. As far as she knows, he can do something with another Dominant, as long as they're both contracted to other people. Usually, they're not cited because of it. It's still sticky here, but it's more frowned upon than realigned.
He hasn't said any of this to Kyle, what with hit study-hermiting. But he has a lot more to say and it will be good to say everything. o maybe say everything. He'll see how things go down. )
Thanks for understanding I needed to press pause on everything.
[It's easy to say everything is fine, that he's just working, and to pretend as if it's all about acclimating instead of the opposite. He doesn't know many people well, so they don't know what's actually normal. Except one, and Kyle has done well on avoiding him just so that he didn't have to talk about it.
Except he wants to talk about it. He wants to not pretend because otherwise he's going to let himself slip away and become what it is they want. ]
Schedules are for people that have lives outside of work so tracking it wouldn't do much good anyways. I have been there a time or two, though I'm trying to avoid drinking too often.
[ It would be much too easy to just drink and not worry about anything else, after all. ]
I do know what you mean, and I understand. My second year of med school my mom flew up to Michigan and texted me from the dorm parking lot to tell me to come to dinner. I called more often then.
I'm not even on the schedule today but I turned my ankle so cutting down my runs.
You're avoiding drinking, and you invited me for a drink.
You turned your ankle? ( How much are you running? He wants to ask, but they're not on those terms and it's his deal whether or not he turns his ankle. ) Yeah. Maybe run less. Listen to me, I'm telling someone to run less. Maybe this place is changing me.
We don't need to get a drink, even though you're the one who suggested it.
[ For a moment Kyle considers all the jokes, the smart ass comments he could make, all of it. Instead he takes a risk and goes with the truth. ]
It seemed less needy that asking if I can sprawl on the couch with my head in your lap while you study. And I'm drinking, just I know how easy it is to stop coping with things and just drink.
[ And he never wants to end up that way, especially not in this place. ]
I went for an early morning run and then ran into someone. It's healing though and they were good about it.
You literally ran into someone. And here I thought people only do that in movies and TV shows. Then again, I thought sexual dystopias were also not a thing, so, point.
You know, if that's what you wanted, you just had to ask. Even if I'm an ass about it, or I haven't been around. Also, if you're around, I won't be studying, at least, not this time.
If this is inviting yourself over, the door's unlocked, and leftover whatever resembles Indian food in the fridge. And yeah. I'm here, too.
( He's currently sprawled out on his couch, legs stretched out in tight where they count, but loose-fitting sweat pants, bare foot and in a classic white-tee. Highlighter in his mouth, he turns another page, wanting to get in a few more minutes of this chapter.
He is the picture of relaxed studying, very I woke up this perfect, look at me not trying. )
[There's no response back to the last text. None needed as he takes the elevator down to the fifth floor. Walking in without hesitation, actually glad that Jackson seemed to understand. He hadn't changed, figuring jeans and a navy Henley were fine. His wardrobe is at least growing, and he's been glad for that, even if he does so little in the way of socializing. Not nearly as much as he really needs to in this place.
For now though, he is just focusing on here and now and talking out a few of the things that have gone on, have someone to talk to.
Even if he kind of stops, just watching Jackson for a few minutes. He knows after things that had been said to him he should be bothered at how young and studious Jackson looks but he just can't let it bother him. Instead just smiling at the tableau, finding fond memories and new desires in that image. ]
( Jackson raises his eyes, but not the tilt of his head, as he looks back down and smirks. His other hand moves a few books from the cushion sitting next to him, making room for Kyle. )
You feeling bad about something. I believe it. Let it go for tonight?
( He exhales, stretching and setting a book on his lap aside before turning his head to face Kyle. )
I'm your only lawyer to be. ( He pauses, because there is no 'my or your' but in this case there kind of is, and that doesn't bother him like it could. ) And he's letting himself have as much of a life as it looks. Eventually, I'll take the advanced test. That's all it is, but I need to be ready. Strike all that. ( He leans in, placing a kiss to Kyle's lips, something he hadn't done in some time. ) Better now that you're here. That's a better answer, right? I can win points for that?
[Listening though, taking in what he said earlier, and what Jackson is saying now. The smile he has fades a bit when he's told to strike that.
His fingers lightly brush along Jackson's jaw, eyes closing briefly at the kiss.]
If you needed points, yes. That would get them. About the same amount as being open with me and complaining because law school has to be Hell. Says the guy that nearly gave up on medical school a few times.
[Shifting a bit closer, he moves to rest his head on Jackson's shoulder for a minute, feeling about worn down as he had during said school, but for a myriad of different reasons. He'd gone charging into his place as if he could handle anything, and much as he likes to make out that he can, it's getting to him.
He just tries not to let himself think about the fact that when he felt that strain, the one and only person he wanted to text was Jackson.]
I think this is the part where I act like a nag and ask if you've eaten in like the last day or something. And don't give me some shit about werewolf metabolism or something. I'm not saying I know better but don't even try it.
( It's more a notion of how he sees Kyle, but he's also talking to a tenacious, often overly critical person. Jackson may never have given up, but he did and wanted unhealthy things to succeed.
Opening up to Kyle, or anyone besides Ethan, his therapist, or family is new. But, he doesn't hate it if it gets him couch cuddles. Jackson peers down at Kyle before laying his own head back, just feeling the moment. )
You don't nag, and you never have to worry about me eating. Even when life turns to shit, werewolf metabolism comes with a werewolf appetite. ( That may not have been true as a human, but as a werewolf, he was always hungry. ) You? Do you need me to nag back and ask if you've eaten in the last 48 hours?
Shhhh, allow me to pretend I'm still the asshole I once was. Besides, I said nearly.
[Because Jackson's right. Despite the pain and exhaustion, he couldn't just give up. If not for himself, then his parents. Especially his mom who had just gone nuts over the idea of her son, their first generation, going on to become a doctor.
It's reassuring to know that with all of the studies and the hard push he's giving himself to get things done that Jackson will do as Kyle says and not as he did in school. Hypocrite and Hippocratic. He can do both.]
In two days? Yeah, I can say I have. [Pausing with a smile before adding.] Actually this morning before work.
[He barely pauses before asking something that's been on his mind.]
You said you asked to be changed. Have you ever heard of it being something like a curse. One action and suddenly you're changed?
Why? I don't. I'm still an asshole. With more purpose.
( And self awareness. He thinks about what Kyle asks, knowing that yes, it's not that he's just heard this, but for many that is how it is. )
If you're bitten, and you weren't asked to be bitten. If left alone, if it isn't what you wanted, it lives like a curse. If they're left to fend for themselves, they could do anything. McCall didn't ask. Scott - that kid from my school. And Derek, before going on his biting frenzy, didn't offer the bite. Not until after he bit me. ( A beat as he considers. ) The first time Derek promised me the bite, he told me to meet him in his family's shithole of a burnt down house. But, he never intended to bite me then. Hunters being there is the only reason I made it out alive.
[There's a lot that Kyle wants to talk to Jackson about when it comes to werewolves, to the things that Kyle's been told and yet he can't bring himself to go into that. Not yet. Not when he finds himself desperately needing to talk to Jackson about that.]
He's changed though, right? [He knows how that goes, after all. It doesn't worry him less. Not when it comes to Jackson's well being in this place.] I mean, if you're thinking about being his beta, he's not like that anymore? You trust him?
( He shifts, not intending to disturb Kyle, but the doctor's head should be up for this. Kyle should be facing him for this. )
Kyle. I said yes to Derek. He's my Alpha now. We've both done ill-concieved, terrible things for reasons we thought were right at the time. But, I needed to make the decision to trust him. And that means you too can trust him. Pack extends. I told him that. We're somewhere between friends and something else and that means something to me. It means something to Pack. You don't have to be okay with it, or accept it, or recognize him as anything other than my alpha. But, McCall had a human in his Pack too. It didn't suck for him.
[He's changed is what Kyle needs to hear. He's made himself not be that guy, not gone around to see what Derek's like and act like an asshole or an idiot about whatever this is. They've both been clear that it's something, but Kyle knows next to nothing about pack life, about being a werewolf, and what Jackson needs because of it? He hasn't a clue. No more than what he's been told.
Head canting slightly as he lifts it, considers Jackson as he admits he accepted the offer. He stays quiet, listening, though he can't hide a spark of shock and a bit of confusion at what he says.]
You told him pack extends... to me?
[He can't help the hint of awe in his tones, even if it wasn't him specifically but this person in Jackson's life in general terms. He's not sure what he expected.
No, he knows what he expected. He expected Jackson to keep his lives separate. Now he's realizing that he hasn't, no more than Kyle hasn't talked about Jackson. At least by name to Alex, and about emotions Kyle feels to others.]
This, us? It means a lot to me, Jackson, and if you trust him? Then I trust you about him. Okay? I mean, let's be honest. What I know about werewolves and your needs as one would about fill a thimble. Even with learning that this guy everyone keeps mistaking me for was a werewolf vampire hybrid. Hell, that only made things more confusing.
I never thought about the fact that with every world that seems to have supernatural beings, they're all different from one world to the next, but I'm basing things off yours right now because that's the one that matters.
( Not exactly, Jackson thinks as his lower lip drops, his mouth opening. Kyle takes it in earnest, but Jackson keeps back that he told Derek he had people in this city he trusts. He didn't name anyone specific. They didn't get there. They boosted each other's - maybe not egos, but they entrusted one another. Names will come up in time. But, Kyle's is bound to come up more.
In truth, the deliberate separation on both their parts pushed Kyle to the back of Jackson's mind - but in thinking, obviously Kyle fell under that.
Hold every thought, though. )
You're - people are mistaking you for a werewolf vampire hybrid?
[Thoughts of this Tyler is one of the things that had prompted the text Kyle had sent. A need to talk to someone he trusted about all of this, and really at this time those he'd turn to are slim.
This though is something he's really wanted to bring up to Jackson, if only in hopes of understanding any of it himself.]
Several people. Apparently he's well known to them in their world, and his name is Tyler Lockwood and depending on who you talk to, he's not well liked.
[ Which wasn't comforting at all, especially when even after he'd been attacked, they were still warning him about Klaus. ]
I was actually attacked in my first days here after being mistaken for him, and warned about another who might try and kill me. He's kind of why I was asking about curses. Apparently he was cursed, his whole family, and after he killed someone? He turned.
( Everything Kyle says, Jackson likes less. Kyle's the doppelganger of some vampire-werewolf hybrid someone here in this city wants to kill, and other people straight up hate. )
You were attacked, and someone in this city might want to kill you. Does this someone know you're not this Kyle asshole?
It's really no big deal. I was blind sided and shoved into a wall and threatened and then...
[Part of him wants to blow it off but his luck would be one day Hayley or Alex might talk with Jackson and tell him the truth.]
Once we worked out who I was and wasn't, I helped her out because she was starving and let her...
[He touches his neck where the small scars had healed and were starting to fade.]
She was the first one to mention the whole doppelganger thing, which trust me, I've looked up since then. At least what this place has on it. The ones I've met, they know I'm not him, including the one I was warned about. He was very... friendly. I found that pretty much scarier than if he'd tried to kill me.
[Shifting to turn to face Jackson more fully, drawing one leg up along the cushion even as he reaches out, running his hand along Jackson's arm. Though if it's to calm Jackson of himself is anyone's guess.]
Okay, we've discussed my issues with not being able to turn those in need away. I'm working on it. This was two months ago. I had just been...
[ He sighs, realizing he's putting so much on Jackson because of his own issues, and if anyone doesn't deserve that, it's Jackson.]
I had been through a lot, and failed a lot of people. As far as I can tell though, everyone that hates him knows I'm not him.
Kyle. It's me. I'm on the poster for Been Through A lot.
( He put people through a lot. )
I'm not blaming you for letting a bite-happy vamp get a taste, although we need to work on your self preservation. Between your long hours and your tendency to give yourself over to people who hate your doppelganger. You could make better choices. Not that I can talk about my choices in the last month.
[He can't help but smile at Jackson's comment about his lack of self preservation instincts, as well as the truth about them and bad choices. He sighs softly.]
It's why I wanted to come see you today. I like being with you. I don't worry about my choices with you, or what this place makes seem normal so I don't question what I'm doing until after.
And I don't give a shit if I sound sappy either. [He smiles then, looking more relaxed than he has in a while, feeling it as well after talking about it all.] You can't prove I said it after all.
I could torture you into admitting it. But, this place -- you might like it too much. Wouldn't be torture. ( But, feelings. Okay. He does smile. ) I like being with you too, Kyle. Now. Were you lying to me about wanting to cuddle, because this is officially a break in studying.
I can't be in this place so long that I think torture is sexy, so you would definitely get me to admit it.
It was not a lie. I wouldn't lie to you if I can ever help it. I might try and lure you out for dinner at some point, or into cuddles but not lie. I mean, it's not lying to say both are for your health.
[And with that he scoots closer, moving to rest his head on Jackson's shoulder again.]
You call breaking and entering a talent, I call it one step away from a felony. But, don't listen to me. Two kids in my school kidnapped me and held me in an armored car.
Yes, Bellamy. I know. I got this all from her. Reclusing helped. You get that I'm replying. No longer a recluse. You can stand down.
So proud of the random nineteen year old who's taking advantage of your wife's generosity.
The fun is that they thought it'd keep me and everyone else safe. I broke out easily. Kanimas are strong. And slippery.
I do know. People don't pick locks for me, so when somebody does it, I notice. I care about her, too. I don't show it all the time. I'll never be that guy.
You thanked me that day, the next, and two days after that. Thanks today for last week is unnecessary.
Are we twinning, Kyle. You're not the only one with news. There's a sky restaurant a few blocks down from Dominant housing. I've been meaning to check it out. Don't worry, I won't be throwing anyone over any railings.
If that means teeth, you'll be the one thrown off the balcony.
You have news. I get it. Let me maybe shower, look mildly presentable for the sky bar. Can you wait twenty minutes
( He doesn't wait for an answer, because there's grooming to be done, a much needed shower to be had. Kyle can't smell Reggie on Jackson, something Jackson wasn't expecting. A new werewolf, courtesy of Derek Hale, let loose on this freaking city. All instincts and intoxicating arousal. He didn't like the kid like that, but smelling it, that nervous, new, horny energy had flipped a switch in him temporarily.
One that had flipped back.
He pushes aside their encounter as he showers, dresses and fixes his hair, even pulling out the blow dryer.
What he loses in time getting ready, he makes up for in werewolf parkour. He's alone in the elevator up, but when he steps out, there's Kyle. Jackson's wearing the blue suit Kyle might remember, from his first night, now tailored, rumpled and mended from the fight. It's one of his favorites. Designer and his from London. Not here. But, he cleans up good. )
For the record, I don't like being told to hurry. ( But that is even playful. He's contracted now, and according to Emma they get to have a relationship, should they want one, or to fool around, etc. In public, all they can do is the small kiss he presses to Kyle's lips, quick and greeting. )
I don't want to explore the death mechanics of this place personally... and I appreciate any intimacies we share too much for that.
[ Which is perhaps why he takes his time getting ready. There's been purchases of new clothes, both because he's accepting his life in this place and because every other week he swears something gets damaged either through work or the hell this place puts them through.
Carefully casual nonchalance takes him longer than he wants it to, ignoring how much time he's putting into trying to look like he didn't take too much time getting ready, finally settling on a black silk sweater with black slim trousers and a matching jacket.
Lighting up when he sees Jackson, chuckling at that reminder.]
If it helps, you are entirely worth any wait. Definitely worth it.
[Sliding his hand along Jackson's lapel as he leans into him for a moment, wanting to follow that kiss with another. Public. He reminds himself where they are, contract or not, and straightens his jacket as he looks Jackson over again.]
Hello yourself. Glad to have a chance to come up here.
( He hasn't always been the worth the wait, but you can bet he's always believed himself to be. He'd kiss Kyle again, but they're still getting used to - well, he's getting used to his new normal. )
What are we doing but, taking the chances we have.
( Which is weirdly philosophical but, either way, he turns toward the bar. )
[He can't help himself, his fingers lightly brushing against Jackson's hand. The temptation is there to pull him close, wanting to kiss him again, but the constant concern of being sanctioned for their relationship holds him in check.
Even if he does sway towards Jackson.]
Actually something I feel I'm definitely learning here. To take the chances I have no matter what I'm risking.
[It's why he's there. Because the chance to see Jackson, to have what amounts to a date with him in public in this place, it's worth the risks.
( He bites the air quickly and playfully, but, steps back. Maybe when he shares his news they can act a bit differently. A bit more intimately. )
You're right to. I'll throw someone else overboard. Maybe if they get the temperature of my steak wrong. ( He smirks. ) Let's take our seats. The sooner we sit, the sooner we order. And - we both have news.
Someone's in a good mood, and going to be a tease. I see how tonight's going to go.
[And he loves it, unable to stop smiling because the one weight that had been on his shoulders since he came to this place is finally eased. Not complete though, not when he's still worrying about Jackson.]
Well here's hoping they're on their game tonight. Be a shame to ruin a good night having to deal with the guards.
[Though he's not even sure they would. How does that work here? Would they answer to the guards or just to the dom of the person? Nope, not thoughts he wants to have right now.
His hand brushes Jackson's, finding himself in that mental place where he really just wants any contact with him, those same emotions that had been chaotic and desired since they met roiling up within Kyle once more.
Resisting the urge to take Jackson's hand even as he brushes past him with more contact than needed and heading for their table.]
( He'll shrug at that. Maybe he will be, maybe he won't be. )
Guards lead to being realigned, or the People Zoo. Let's avoid consequences. At least for tonight. Leaves something to look forward to tomorrow.
( The guards could come up, or any other diner here could be a plainclothes guard. Jackson follows after Kyle, feeling that small surge in their mutual touch. They reach one of the tables on the outdoor balcony, settling themselves down by the aforementioned railing.
Jackson waits for the submissive waiter nervously lists the specials and disappears before speaking. )
I know I'm intimidating, but this city takes it to another level. All because we're dominants.
[Kyle sobers at mention of the punishments that could come from even the littlest things, the things he'd feared when he'd gotten so drunk that night. Not that he plans to let that happen again.
Settling in at the rail, glad for the view even as he glances toward the submissive, listening though he finds himself distracted, wondering why the waiter acts that way. Was their dom cruel? Had they been punished too often. He tries to think about Margo acting that way and nearly chokes, covering his mouth with a cough.]
Wait, you're intimidating?
[Smiling though as he says it, glancing toward where the waiter went and back to Jackson.]
Seriously though, it makes you wonder. Though it's kind of why I wanted to see you. Well, one of the reasons why.
[After Jackson had come to his rescue, it made him realize he wanted to make more time for him, for those that he's becoming close to in this place, but definitely for Jackson.]
I'm contracted. It actually happened after you saved my ass from being an idiot. And it's not one of the cats.
( He glares, glares, and glares some more. Yes. He is intimidating. He always has been. He just doesn't always try to be.
He perks an eyebrow up at that, the partial subject change and waits to here the news Kyle beat him to. )
Glad Andrew Lloyd Webber didn't sell his soul to you. ( Ethan and CATS, though. ) But, ( He takes Kyle's hand in his and then grasps it with his other hand. ) I'm happy you're contracted. I'm not - taking it lightly. It's important. Like - Like mine. Like me. I'm contracted, too. Way to be competitive.
[Perhaps it's a disappointment, but Kyle doesn't look at all bothered with that glare. Perhaps it's because it just manages to make Jackson look more attractive in his eyes.
Smiling as his fingers curl around Jackson's, not having entirely thought about how much could change with these contracts, how much more leeway they have.
He laughs though at the competitive comment, shaking his head. ]
Not competitive. That's the best news I could have heard tonight. After the other day, I've worried about how things could end up for both of us so I'm glad we don't have to worry about that.
[At least for three months.]
So, who are they? Who am I being jealous of?
[Not that he looks the least bit worried about that. Not in the least.]
( There's a half of an eye roll Kyle gets as Jackson's nose wrinkles. )
They are Harry. They're a wizard. They're a he. ( For starters. ) He's prickly and skittish but he's not horrible to be around. He has a dark sense of humor and he went through a large-scale war. He's seen some shit. ( So have they all. ) Octavia's looking for a place and I'm helping. It's got me thinking - I might look for one, too. So I can put Harry up, take him out of the Down.
So. We're both contracted, and to people who use magic. Without telling each other. We find each other our first day. Is this something special, Valenti? You and me?
As if. [He definitely scoffs at that.] And not even counting the photo shoot wardrobe. Though, in fairness, I haven't seen you in heels.
[There's a nervousness that leaves Kyle hesitating in answer that right away. They've talked around this a time or two, and he is never sure how far he should go in admitting he thoughts on it. On them. If there's one thing he's been gaining in his time in Duplicity it's not letting himself be held back. Even if he's still working himself to death.]
Honestly? I think so. I have for months now. This just confirms it for me. Not that you need me to tell you that you're special, but you're special to me.
Jackson doesn't know quite how he feels. He can argue and see that the both of them have coincidences in spades - or not. They have always gotten along. He likes boning Kyle, and he likes being around Kyle. But, is it betraying Ethan if Ethan isn't there. He doesn't know. )
[He raises his hands in what amounts more of less to surrender, trying to consider how to word this. ]
The sex is great, that's without saying but it's more than that for me and has been. I like the time we spend together, and... Hell, I even worried about how much there would be with your move because see you is important to me.
[It's been so long since he's had these kind of thoughts and feelings, he's not even sure how to word it. Especially given he knows things are different for Jackson. Their anniversary of the day they met is his anniversary as well.]
( It may not be what Kyle wants to here. It may not be elaborate. But, Jackson listens, really listens. He sucks in a breath and takes Kyle's hand again, squeezing it. )
[Turning his hand to cup Jackson's hand, holding his hand for a moment, considering him seriously. He doesn't want to think about how crazy it is to want to be this involved with someone here. The rules are capricious and they haven't a clue when the world will fall apart, nonetheless send them back to the worlds they came from. But for now, this between them is something he wants for the time he can have it.]
That's all that matters then. We can figure out the rest as we go.
Is that supposed to be a challenge. It's not something you tell just anyone. Doesn't everyone have a kinkier side to them built in? It's something you discover. Over time.
You're asking me what I think, or you're trying to get me to ask you out. Where I come from, people usually just do the asking. Is that what you want? Do you want to go out with me?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Un: Swan
Date: 2019-11-04 09:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 01:21 am (UTC)I never shared this much with my ex. Did he tell you we drank together? He's not a very good influence, Emma.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 02:07 am (UTC)Bellamy isn't an ex. Besides, you came by looking for me.
I didn't realize you were looking for a role model here.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 02:41 am (UTC)I'm not. I tend to BE the role model.
Ethan is only an ex because he's not here. I'm not delusional enough to keep hope alive, and I don't wish this on anyone. Before coming here, we were in danger. I know we got through it. But, that doesn't matter because it's not me. I'm here. Meeting your not-ex, who, is very inspirational.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 04:24 am (UTC)My partner. He's my partner.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 04:29 am (UTC)So, the straights are co-opting queer language here, too. Good to know things are consistent across all realms.
( He's actually being cheeky, which means that for all intents and purposes he likes Emma and Bellamy. Or, at the very least he can stand them. Maybe he'll gain respect for them.
But he can't help how Emma will take it and he's not about to preface anything after the fact. Or, justify. He said what he said. Dealwithit.gif. )
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 04:45 am (UTC)[ she has to laugh at his point and his assumption. this city's a nightmare, but she's found herself drawn to a lot of people here, and she's never bothered to worry about anything beyond it feeling right.]
Bellamy's from space, our timelines couldn't be much farther apart. We'll only have this here.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:45 am (UTC)Is he an alien?
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:48 am (UTC)He grew up on a space station after a nuclear apocalypse.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:54 am (UTC)( Can't they look like humans when they want? Don't they? )
He wins for most insane story. Does he have radiation poisoning? He's not dying, is he
( The funny thing is, he's not concerned. He just wants to know if he shouldn't drink in proximity to the dying man from space. Space cancer is probably ten times worse than Earth cancer. Maybe even dangerous to werewolves. )
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 06:01 am (UTC)[ no one would know better than Emma.]
You haven't heard everyone's story yet. And no. If he dies, I'll kill him.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 06:05 am (UTC)So, were you going to reprimand me for almost breaking your door or are you fishing for what I think of your life partner.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 06:10 am (UTC)[ look at that, apparently they don't tell each other everything.]
Neither. I heard you were upset, thought I'd check in.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-05 05:20 pm (UTC)Your door's fine. Bellamy made a crack about coming inside before I break it down. And billing me. I may have used excessive force when I knocked.
( He may have pounded on the door, even. )
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 03:55 am (UTC)You know I'm not the one who trapped us here, right?
[ don't take it out on her door, Jackson!]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:00 am (UTC)Lucky me, my bite triggered something else first. No, you don't get the long story, yes I'm both. I can change at will. I have an entire spiel usually when I explain it but I'm too tired right now. And what I really am isn't common knowledge.
No. I don't know that. Tell me again how you didn't capture all of us and your life partner. Please.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:11 am (UTC)[ that's Emma Swan, asking the important questions.]
You can use his name, it's Bellamy.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:23 am (UTC)I know you and BELLAMY did not trap me here.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:32 am (UTC)That's better.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 04:55 am (UTC)I know.
Is this where you say, that's why we all need to stick together? I've never braided friendship bracelets before, they tend to clash with more expensive accessories.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:13 am (UTC)I'm making tacos tonight. Should I make extra?
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:17 am (UTC)I'll bring tequila. Or whatever passes for tequila here.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-06 05:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-14 06:12 am (UTC)[Attachment]
Also, you heard about people running into people they knew before?
[Because dammit, he doesn't like thinking about Jesse Manes showing up in this place. And ignoring the twinges when he thinks about this Ethan showing up because, in the end, he hopes he does for Jackson's sake but not the happiest of thoughts either. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-14 06:19 am (UTC)Maybe you should sterilize less medical equipment and focus on your own. At least more than once every two weeks. Or, I could find an alpha, kill him, and then turn you. Solve all of your problems. Offer's on the table. Just saying.
( He feels comfortable around Kyle, and when texting him. They don't always see one another, or always talk and they've yet to go on a real date even though they agreed they both - wanted to - but still, this message makes him smile. )
I liked going to the gym after nine. You weed out the freaks and the lurkers.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-14 06:29 am (UTC)[ Which was easier than what happened later. He's still not sure what to make of that, except to chalk it up to charms and pretend it never, ever happened. Not entirely mature but better than trying to work out what happened with Manes and his dominant. ]
Where's the sympathy? I'm trying to stay in shape for the sake of others, thank you very little.
If you're going to be a tease, there should be more nudity involved. Always thought werewolf was better than vampires in that whole eternal war thing anyways.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-14 06:39 am (UTC)I didn't know talking up my gym habits was being a tease. I'll be sure to send you a tasteless gym selfie the next time I'm there.
And I don't do sympathy.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-14 09:20 pm (UTC)[He knows he's more or less rambling because texting Jackson is better than thinking about all the shit with Manes. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-15 01:50 am (UTC)Did you say your friend's dad shot you? It was your dad's friend who was the family friend? That shot you. And now his son is here?
Are you okay?
no subject
Date: 2019-11-15 04:09 am (UTC)Yeah. I think I am. Maybe. Alex and I were working together against his dad before the shooting. A lot of it is more him not knowing I'm bi since I tortured him in high school because I was afraid and finding out when I hit on him.
And then he hit me.
[ Okay so a few times but still. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-15 06:37 am (UTC)You hit on your friend, realized you were bisexual, and then he punched you. In that order.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-15 08:06 pm (UTC)[ He's not arguing, but he's curious. ]
Not quite. I've known since I ran out on a game of spin the bottle calling him every name in the book. That was the end of our friendship until about six months ago.
He found out here when I hit on him, and schooled me on why being in the closet and being homophobic because of it is bad. In fairness, I've had months to tell him before we even ended up here, and I was scared.
[ He's kind of glad to be talking about this in text, because in that he's still a bit weak about this, and he's glad not to see Jackson's face knowing the horrible person he's been. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-15 08:20 pm (UTC)You randomly hit on him here, in a place like this. Out of nowhere. You had months, but really, you had years. Except, you were afraid.
I was unaware. My one goal was always being the best. I was the best student, the best athlete. The best boyfriend. Except, I was a shitty boyfriend and I only had Lydia because it meant I had a girlfriend. She's brilliant, even to this day, and I recognized it. I think a part of me cared about her, but there was a bigger part of me that cared about winning and getting better. It was only after I stepped back, moved away from everything I knew, and went into mandatory therapy that I started seeing that.
I was mean, but I was also cruel. I had one friend, who I think just liked me because we'd always been friends.
Look, I don't usually say all this crap, but I want you to see that being a bully, or shooting your shot in a fucked up city, it happens. You're not alone here.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-16 12:07 am (UTC)Fucked up as it is, I'm glad I'm not alone in this. Coming back to Roswell, I've blamed myself for a lot, and much as I can justify the fear, I hate that I tried to destroy him just so his dad wouldn't destroy me.
He beat him all the time for being gay, and I was scared he'd hit me too. Not that I never put it together my dad, the sheriff, knew it was happening and rather then save Alex just let it happen. Got him killed, though guess it just would have been sooner otherwise.
I think I loved my girlfriend back then, and she's a friend again now, but I know part of it then was she was the smartest girl in school. Now she's going to end up with the soulful literature loving cowboy. Can you hear eyerolling in text?
Thanks though for not just telling me I'm not alone.
[ He would have believed Jackson if he had just said it but it means a lot to Kyle that he opened up like that. ]
This place is a lot of it, but not just because of what it is. It's easier when it's not that town. I hadn't realized how much I've been withdrawing about who I am while coping with everything going on. It felt easy to just be myself here and now I feel on guard again.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-16 01:27 am (UTC)Now that I've said that, I'm going to catch up. Being here is fucked up, and how you treated Alex, and how his father treated him, and how you two treated each other, it's all fucked up. All of it. Maybe it's easier when you leave everything you know behind. All you have is you and everything else. In London, I was Jackson Whittemore, guy from California. Not Jackson Whittemore, perfectionist or Jackson Whittemore, unwilling murderer. Just, Jackson Whittemore. In Beacon Hills I wore my last name with pride. In London, it mattered to me less.
What I hate about being here is being uprooted from a life I made myself against my will. That guard I dropped is up again. And not just because of the charms. Because, for the first time in two years, I'm unsure again.
Some footnotes. I thought I was the only one who could effectively eye roll through text. It's always the soulful, nice ones who seem to get the girl, but I didn't make an effort to get any girl. Or, guy for that matter for a long time. And I know about loving the smartest girl in school, probably in California. She's one of my best friends.
I hope you appreciate all these texts, I don't send shit like this. But, you sound like you need to read it. So. Read it. But don't weep, I don't know if these devices are waterproof.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-16 04:19 am (UTC)So assuming we're not including The Waterboy. What about Any Given Sunday? Can't argue Van Der Beek.
[ Don't trust the B James, definitely. ]
We both changed our lives, and that was our choice. This is having that ripped away and pushed into rolls we might not want. Not the same thing as leaving behind the golden child of a town for the man we want to be. Just like it was easier just being me here before I had a reason to remember the asshole I was.
[And maybe he shouldn't just forget like that, but he'd also like to hope they can get to a point where Alex isn't just punching Kyle when he sees him unless a charm is involved. God, he'd really like to stop being hit by Alex Manes.
Or end up in bed with him and another because of the charms. For Kyle that introduction to this place has been harder than he might have thought. It makes him question what's him, and what he's becoming. The only time he doesn't is when he's with Jackson. Then it just feels natural.]
Though here's my closest to weepy you're going to get even with opening up, and thank you for that. I appreciate it. I'm glad I've got someone here I can have these talks with, and mock mercilessly for his dead wolf coat, and get through this with.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-17 01:24 am (UTC)( Even the series. It's not his cup of freaking tea but Ethan convinced him to watch. Ethan was right. Ethan's usually right. )
I was never the golden child. I was the kid from The Omen.
That is NOT my coat.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-17 02:45 am (UTC)Damien? Really?
It snows here? I think I'm going to try and lure you out in the moonlight in that coat and a pair of jeans for another photoshoot. Since you have the camera and all.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-17 02:47 am (UTC)I had a lot of issues to work through. I didn't always have healthy coping mechanisms. Or tact.
I will gladly give you back the camera. Or better yet, smash it.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-17 07:38 pm (UTC)Wait, you have tact? Can't wait to see that. Promise to be suitably impressed.
[ Despite the fact he's catching on that he's seeing sides of Jackson that others aren't, he can't help but to give him shit. ]
Ruining all my fun. So sad.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-18 05:38 pm (UTC)Keep being a bitch. See where it gets you.
The saddest.
un: swan
Date: 2019-11-21 04:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:22 am (UTC)( Emma gets his default setting, but always with a twist of genuine appreciation. If he goes off like this, if he types more than one sentence, he must care. )
I like her. She's a straight shooter. I sound like my dad.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:33 am (UTC)[ he thinks he's funny. her memory is fine, miraculously, after all she's been through. but the reality is that the memory thing happens a lot where she's from.]
I like her too, it's been a long time since Bellamy's had her in his life. I think he's still processing everything.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:40 am (UTC)( He's joking. of course. But he'd be there if he knew more. He just doesn't say that. He never says that. )
I wouldn't know. I'm an only child.
It sucks what this place is, but they have each other again. Maybe that makes it okay. Or better.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:49 am (UTC)[ he's probably heard her refer to Bellamy as Starshine, even if she was saying it quietly. his nickname for her is Princess, and in some ways that's relevant, too.]
Yeah. My dad says family always finds each other.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 05:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:15 am (UTC)As in, now. As in werewolf speed at her door, and probably the most gingerly knock he's ever given. )
no subject
Date: 2019-11-21 06:57 am (UTC)- wait, no. that's dangerous. that's the death of privacy and the potential for disaster all rolled into one. maybe she should just be glad he's learning how to knock without taking the door off. either way, he doesn't have to wait long before she pulls it open.] Hey, come in. [ she steps aside, closing the door behind her, and whether he wants it or not, there's cocoa on the coffee table.]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-22 02:04 am (UTC)Derek's here. Again. He was here before, but he's here - now. Today. And yesterday.
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Date: 2019-11-25 05:22 am (UTC)They sent him home and brought him back? It happens. It just - let's rewind, what does it mean for you?
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Date: 2019-11-26 04:05 pm (UTC)It means that, he's from before he loses the spark that makes him an Alpha. By definition, I'm his Beta again. Which he wants.
no subject
Date: 2019-12-01 06:47 pm (UTC)[ once they figure that out, they can work from there. but the other guy doesn't get priority just because he's expecting something from Jackson. it doesn't work that way for her.]
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Date: 2019-12-03 02:11 am (UTC)( He stops short of giving her the entire rundown. Family is something he has back home and he's gotten better at recognizing it and maintaining it. But, family also implies trust and he's not sure he trusts Derek. He fucked up his first time he made Betas. And two out of the four of them died. But there isn't an alpha pack here and -- well, he's dating a former member. He's not usually in his head but it's complicated and that's what his eyes convey, too. )
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:01 am (UTC)[ look, she understands that being a werelizard where he's from is different than what she's seen Ruby go through. she isn't going to claim to understand most of it, but doing it because he feels he's without other options isn't the best reason to trust someone. in her opinion, it's one of the worst.
he could probably dig a little deeper than that. it's practical, and he doesn't know all the ways she could protect him - but she would, without hesitation. without him needing to feel like he's under someone's thumb.]
Is that all he has going for him?
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:10 am (UTC)( There's also the hand job. And the chemistry he didn't expect. )
It's worth considering.
( He thinks. )
He wasn't - when he first bit me - I made him. I told you the bite affected me differently. Derek and his betas hunted me. Derek and his brother killed me.
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:22 am (UTC)[ to be fair, Regina's tried to kill her before, too. but it's different, being the person who was targeted and hearing about it from someone else - someone who's just a kid himself. she doesn't like where this is going.]
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:26 am (UTC)( But they still killed him. )
I rose up a full-werewolf after, and I reluctantly let Derek teach me 'how to werewolf' before I moved. ( And he was stubborn, and had compartmentalized everything. ) What happened to me isn't his fault.
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:29 am (UTC)[ family sure as hell doesn't kill each other. even if they come close sometimes.]
Help me understand. Why do you really want to do this?
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:35 am (UTC)( With Kyle it's all too close. It burned brightly, but it's hard. Hard to maintain and to keep and to let go. )
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:41 am (UTC)she tenses visibly at the explanation, nodding her understanding since words would either come out defensive or hurt, and that's more vulnerability than she's willing to let anyone see when he's already shut her down. but after a moment, after seemingly let the words sink in, she continues.
it's fine. not like he's family to her, either.]
Then I guess you have to do what's best for you.
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Date: 2019-12-03 04:59 am (UTC)( He's not lost to her reaction. He's not heartless. He doesn't mean to hurt her. None of this is about her, or about Bellamy. How does he come out and say that they are like his family. That they've become like his family. That he cares. )
I don't know anything here. I haven't fulfilled my contract, any contract, only my quota. And that's with someone who could get me arrested. I - I don't know how to do any of this, Emma. You - you are, okay. You're like family, but if I let myself think of you like family -- I'm not always a good person. ( He's spiraling as he tries to come up with the proper words. ) I need to get a better - foothold. I need -- ( He just shakes his head slowly, back and forth, not really knowing what it is he needs. Or what he needs to say, or what he can say. )
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Date: 2019-12-03 05:32 am (UTC)[ it's a long, painful story. more importantly, it's hers, when she thinks they need to focus on what he's going through right now. but the point stands - whatever they've offered him, it isn't dependent on him being a good person. she and Bellamy have both had moments where they were anything but.]
You have time to find a contract, and as far as quota - is this a designation thing?
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Date: 2019-12-03 05:34 am (UTC)( Dominants. )
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Date: 2019-12-03 05:38 am (UTC)[ maybe it's more than he wanted to know, but it shows what the city prioritizes here.]
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Date: 2019-12-03 05:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-03 05:42 am (UTC)[ she's seen people get citations for publicly being with another person of their designation, but not as often as he might expect.]
If you're with someone of your designation, I think what they want is for you to be discreet about it, and to be willing to sign a contract.
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Date: 2019-12-03 05:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-03 05:51 am (UTC)[ and be careful about what he agrees to in public.]
You'll need to sign a contract, but you have time. Bellamy's initial three months were almost up when he asked me. It happens.
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Date: 2019-12-03 06:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-03 06:05 am (UTC)I know that sometimes when people reach out, it's not what you want, or what you can handle.
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Date: 2019-12-03 06:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-03 06:07 am (UTC)[ or, knowing Jackson - who says it did?]
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Date: 2019-12-03 06:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-03 06:21 am (UTC)[ she could be done there, but - ]
You'll get your shit together. Just try to remember, you have people. You don't need this guy. And if you join his pack, if you decide that's what's best for you...don't do it because you have to.
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Date: 2019-12-03 06:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-04 04:58 am (UTC)Want me to make popcorn?
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Date: 2019-12-04 05:00 am (UTC)( He lets her get up to fret in the kitchen before he calls out. )
Emma. ( And he turns, an arm along the back of the couch. ) Thank you.
un: doc
Date: 2019-12-11 01:34 am (UTC)[ It's a casual text in Kyle's mind... that took him too long to compose. He spent too long thinking he could just go for a run, to grab another shift at Haven. Anything to ignore the way his mind keeps going back to the things he's done here that he's not comfortable with, and fearing he's going to have to embrace whether he likes it or not. ]
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Date: 2019-12-15 09:50 pm (UTC)The great thing about studying the way I want to, I take the breaks I want to. I saw a bar by your hospital. Is it presumptuous to think you've been there before? I could meet you after/before your shift. Admitting that I haven't been tracking your schedule like before.
Not tracking. Been as aware.
You know what I mean.
( Underneath the forbidden part of their friendship, or their dating that was put on pause, is a genuine guy who seems in over his head, but Jackson's no different. He'd been consulting with a lawyer, and he's talked to Emma. As far as she knows, he can do something with another Dominant, as long as they're both contracted to other people. Usually, they're not cited because of it. It's still sticky here, but it's more frowned upon than realigned.
He hasn't said any of this to Kyle, what with hit study-hermiting. But he has a lot more to say and it will be good to say everything. o maybe say everything. He'll see how things go down. )
Thanks for understanding I needed to press pause on everything.
( Literally everything. Not just he and Kyle. )
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Date: 2019-12-15 10:12 pm (UTC)Except he wants to talk about it. He wants to not pretend because otherwise he's going to let himself slip away and become what it is they want. ]
Schedules are for people that have lives outside of work so tracking it wouldn't do much good anyways. I have been there a time or two, though I'm trying to avoid drinking too often.
[ It would be much too easy to just drink and not worry about anything else, after all. ]
I do know what you mean, and I understand. My second year of med school my mom flew up to Michigan and texted me from the dorm parking lot to tell me to come to dinner. I called more often then.
I'm not even on the schedule today but I turned my ankle so cutting down my runs.
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Date: 2019-12-15 10:22 pm (UTC)You turned your ankle? ( How much are you running? He wants to ask, but they're not on those terms and it's his deal whether or not he turns his ankle. ) Yeah. Maybe run less. Listen to me, I'm telling someone to run less. Maybe this place is changing me.
We don't need to get a drink, even though you're the one who suggested it.
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Date: 2019-12-16 02:00 am (UTC)It seemed less needy that asking if I can sprawl on the couch with my head in your lap while you study. And I'm drinking, just I know how easy it is to stop coping with things and just drink.
[ And he never wants to end up that way, especially not in this place. ]
I went for an early morning run and then ran into someone. It's healing though and they were good about it.
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Date: 2019-12-16 02:25 am (UTC)You know, if that's what you wanted, you just had to ask. Even if I'm an ass about it, or I haven't been around. Also, if you're around, I won't be studying, at least, not this time.
If this is inviting yourself over, the door's unlocked, and leftover whatever resembles Indian food in the fridge. And yeah. I'm here, too.
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Date: 2019-12-16 03:44 am (UTC)Okay that doesn't make it better. Even I know that.
I'll be down in a few minutes, and you can study or not. I'm just glad for your company.
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Date: 2019-12-16 04:11 am (UTC)I'll be here.
( He's currently sprawled out on his couch, legs stretched out in tight where they count, but loose-fitting sweat pants, bare foot and in a classic white-tee. Highlighter in his mouth, he turns another page, wanting to get in a few more minutes of this chapter.
He is the picture of relaxed studying, very I woke up this perfect, look at me not trying. )
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Date: 2019-12-17 03:13 am (UTC)For now though, he is just focusing on here and now and talking out a few of the things that have gone on, have someone to talk to.
Even if he kind of stops, just watching Jackson for a few minutes. He knows after things that had been said to him he should be bothered at how young and studious Jackson looks but he just can't let it bother him. Instead just smiling at the tableau, finding fond memories and new desires in that image. ]
Wow. I almost feel bad interrupting now. Almost.
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Date: 2019-12-25 01:46 am (UTC)You feeling bad about something. I believe it. Let it go for tonight?
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Date: 2019-12-26 03:53 am (UTC)[He is amused though, crossing the room and settling onto the couch beside Jackson.]
But this is me. Letting that go.
[At least in feeling bad about interrupting Jackson. More than willing to let it go because he needs this.]
So how's my favorite lawyer to be doing?
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Date: 2019-12-27 03:46 am (UTC)I'm your only lawyer to be. ( He pauses, because there is no 'my or your' but in this case there kind of is, and that doesn't bother him like it could. ) And he's letting himself have as much of a life as it looks. Eventually, I'll take the advanced test. That's all it is, but I need to be ready. Strike all that. ( He leans in, placing a kiss to Kyle's lips, something he hadn't done in some time. ) Better now that you're here. That's a better answer, right? I can win points for that?
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Date: 2019-12-28 12:50 am (UTC)[Listening though, taking in what he said earlier, and what Jackson is saying now. The smile he has fades a bit when he's told to strike that.
His fingers lightly brush along Jackson's jaw, eyes closing briefly at the kiss.]
If you needed points, yes. That would get them. About the same amount as being open with me and complaining because law school has to be Hell. Says the guy that nearly gave up on medical school a few times.
[Shifting a bit closer, he moves to rest his head on Jackson's shoulder for a minute, feeling about worn down as he had during said school, but for a myriad of different reasons. He'd gone charging into his place as if he could handle anything, and much as he likes to make out that he can, it's getting to him.
He just tries not to let himself think about the fact that when he felt that strain, the one and only person he wanted to text was Jackson.]
I think this is the part where I act like a nag and ask if you've eaten in like the last day or something. And don't give me some shit about werewolf metabolism or something. I'm not saying I know better but don't even try it.
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Date: 2019-12-28 01:20 am (UTC)( It's more a notion of how he sees Kyle, but he's also talking to a tenacious, often overly critical person. Jackson may never have given up, but he did and wanted unhealthy things to succeed.
Opening up to Kyle, or anyone besides Ethan, his therapist, or family is new. But, he doesn't hate it if it gets him couch cuddles. Jackson peers down at Kyle before laying his own head back, just feeling the moment. )
You don't nag, and you never have to worry about me eating. Even when life turns to shit, werewolf metabolism comes with a werewolf appetite. ( That may not have been true as a human, but as a werewolf, he was always hungry. ) You? Do you need me to nag back and ask if you've eaten in the last 48 hours?
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Date: 2019-12-28 05:13 pm (UTC)[Because Jackson's right. Despite the pain and exhaustion, he couldn't just give up. If not for himself, then his parents. Especially his mom who had just gone nuts over the idea of her son, their first generation, going on to become a doctor.
It's reassuring to know that with all of the studies and the hard push he's giving himself to get things done that Jackson will do as Kyle says and not as he did in school. Hypocrite and Hippocratic. He can do both.]
In two days? Yeah, I can say I have. [Pausing with a smile before adding.] Actually this morning before work.
[He barely pauses before asking something that's been on his mind.]
You said you asked to be changed. Have you ever heard of it being something like a curse. One action and suddenly you're changed?
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Date: 2019-12-28 08:16 pm (UTC)( And self awareness. He thinks about what Kyle asks, knowing that yes, it's not that he's just heard this, but for many that is how it is. )
If you're bitten, and you weren't asked to be bitten. If left alone, if it isn't what you wanted, it lives like a curse. If they're left to fend for themselves, they could do anything. McCall didn't ask. Scott - that kid from my school. And Derek, before going on his biting frenzy, didn't offer the bite. Not until after he bit me. ( A beat as he considers. ) The first time Derek promised me the bite, he told me to meet him in his family's shithole of a burnt down house. But, he never intended to bite me then. Hunters being there is the only reason I made it out alive.
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Date: 2019-12-30 12:02 am (UTC)He's changed though, right? [He knows how that goes, after all. It doesn't worry him less. Not when it comes to Jackson's well being in this place.] I mean, if you're thinking about being his beta, he's not like that anymore? You trust him?
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Date: 2019-12-30 03:38 pm (UTC)( He shifts, not intending to disturb Kyle, but the doctor's head should be up for this. Kyle should be facing him for this. )
Kyle. I said yes to Derek. He's my Alpha now. We've both done ill-concieved, terrible things for reasons we thought were right at the time. But, I needed to make the decision to trust him. And that means you too can trust him. Pack extends. I told him that. We're somewhere between friends and something else and that means something to me. It means something to Pack. You don't have to be okay with it, or accept it, or recognize him as anything other than my alpha. But, McCall had a human in his Pack too. It didn't suck for him.
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Date: 2019-12-30 10:25 pm (UTC)Head canting slightly as he lifts it, considers Jackson as he admits he accepted the offer. He stays quiet, listening, though he can't hide a spark of shock and a bit of confusion at what he says.]
You told him pack extends... to me?
[He can't help the hint of awe in his tones, even if it wasn't him specifically but this person in Jackson's life in general terms. He's not sure what he expected.
No, he knows what he expected. He expected Jackson to keep his lives separate. Now he's realizing that he hasn't, no more than Kyle hasn't talked about Jackson. At least by name to Alex, and about emotions Kyle feels to others.]
This, us? It means a lot to me, Jackson, and if you trust him? Then I trust you about him. Okay? I mean, let's be honest. What I know about werewolves and your needs as one would about fill a thimble. Even with learning that this guy everyone keeps mistaking me for was a werewolf vampire hybrid. Hell, that only made things more confusing.
I never thought about the fact that with every world that seems to have supernatural beings, they're all different from one world to the next, but I'm basing things off yours right now because that's the one that matters.
no subject
Date: 2019-12-31 12:44 am (UTC)In truth, the deliberate separation on both their parts pushed Kyle to the back of Jackson's mind - but in thinking, obviously Kyle fell under that.
Hold every thought, though. )
You're - people are mistaking you for a werewolf vampire hybrid?
no subject
Date: 2019-12-31 05:09 am (UTC)This though is something he's really wanted to bring up to Jackson, if only in hopes of understanding any of it himself.]
Several people. Apparently he's well known to them in their world, and his name is Tyler Lockwood and depending on who you talk to, he's not well liked.
[ Which wasn't comforting at all, especially when even after he'd been attacked, they were still warning him about Klaus. ]
I was actually attacked in my first days here after being mistaken for him, and warned about another who might try and kill me. He's kind of why I was asking about curses. Apparently he was cursed, his whole family, and after he killed someone? He turned.
no subject
Date: 2019-12-31 08:27 pm (UTC)You were attacked, and someone in this city might want to kill you. Does this someone know you're not this Kyle asshole?
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Date: 2019-12-31 11:26 pm (UTC)[Part of him wants to blow it off but his luck would be one day Hayley or Alex might talk with Jackson and tell him the truth.]
Once we worked out who I was and wasn't, I helped her out because she was starving and let her...
[He touches his neck where the small scars had healed and were starting to fade.]
She was the first one to mention the whole doppelganger thing, which trust me, I've looked up since then. At least what this place has on it. The ones I've met, they know I'm not him, including the one I was warned about. He was very... friendly. I found that pretty much scarier than if he'd tried to kill me.
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Date: 2020-01-02 04:29 am (UTC)( What the hell. Jackson is definitely sliding forward, dropping his legs and sitting up now. He inspects Kyle's next, tilting his head. )
You let her bite you.
( Vampire. )
So - Whoever hates this guy Kyle doesn't want to kill you. Kyle. What the hell.
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Date: 2020-01-03 12:20 am (UTC)Okay, we've discussed my issues with not being able to turn those in need away. I'm working on it. This was two months ago. I had just been...
[ He sighs, realizing he's putting so much on Jackson because of his own issues, and if anyone doesn't deserve that, it's Jackson.]
I had been through a lot, and failed a lot of people. As far as I can tell though, everyone that hates him knows I'm not him.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-03 01:17 am (UTC)( He put people through a lot. )
I'm not blaming you for letting a bite-happy vamp get a taste, although we need to work on your self preservation. Between your long hours and your tendency to give yourself over to people who hate your doppelganger. You could make better choices. Not that I can talk about my choices in the last month.
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Date: 2020-01-03 04:21 am (UTC)It's why I wanted to come see you today. I like being with you. I don't worry about my choices with you, or what this place makes seem normal so I don't question what I'm doing until after.
And I don't give a shit if I sound sappy either. [He smiles then, looking more relaxed than he has in a while, feeling it as well after talking about it all.] You can't prove I said it after all.
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Date: 2020-01-04 03:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-01-05 04:14 am (UTC)I can't be in this place so long that I think torture is sexy, so you would definitely get me to admit it.
It was not a lie. I wouldn't lie to you if I can ever help it. I might try and lure you out for dinner at some point, or into cuddles but not lie. I mean, it's not lying to say both are for your health.
[And with that he scoots closer, moving to rest his head on Jackson's shoulder again.]
no subject
Date: 2020-01-05 08:20 pm (UTC)text; un: b.blake (after that octavia comment)
Date: 2019-12-21 12:41 am (UTC)text;
Date: 2019-12-25 01:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-28 05:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-28 08:07 pm (UTC)I've also been studying.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-02 12:56 am (UTC)You know you can study without becoming a recluse.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-02 04:27 am (UTC)Yes, Bellamy. I know. I got this all from her. Reclusing helped. You get that I'm replying. No longer a recluse. You can stand down.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-04 02:11 am (UTC)Where's the fun in an armored car?
She really cares about you, you know.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-04 03:46 pm (UTC)The fun is that they thought it'd keep me and everyone else safe. I broke out easily. Kanimas are strong. And slippery.
I do know. People don't pick locks for me, so when somebody does it, I notice. I care about her, too. I don't show it all the time. I'll never be that guy.
Text
Date: 2020-01-08 03:23 am (UTC)Also, when you hit a break, let a guy buy you a meal? Got some news for you.
Text
Date: 2020-01-08 03:31 am (UTC)Are we twinning, Kyle. You're not the only one with news. There's a sky restaurant a few blocks down from Dominant housing. I've been meaning to check it out. Don't worry, I won't be throwing anyone over any railings.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-08 05:48 am (UTC)We keep this up and I'm going to get us those little best bitches broken heart necklaces.But that works for me. I'll meet you there?
Wait, why would that be a concern, Jackson? Have you been throwing people off balconies?
no subject
Date: 2020-01-08 06:40 am (UTC)Great, a collar we both can wear to confuse the soldiers.
No, but that's the last time I try to make a joke with you. Meet you there.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-08 08:45 pm (UTC)I live for making their lives difficult.
Hey, who knows if someone was being a dick. Not how I want to find out we come back from the dead but...
And hurry. I'm kind of starving.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-09 02:08 pm (UTC)You have news. I get it. Let me maybe shower, look mildly presentable for the sky bar. Can you wait twenty minutes
( He doesn't wait for an answer, because there's grooming to be done, a much needed shower to be had. Kyle can't smell Reggie on Jackson, something Jackson wasn't expecting. A new werewolf, courtesy of Derek Hale, let loose on this freaking city. All instincts and intoxicating arousal. He didn't like the kid like that, but smelling it, that nervous, new, horny energy had flipped a switch in him temporarily.
One that had flipped back.
He pushes aside their encounter as he showers, dresses and fixes his hair, even pulling out the blow dryer.
What he loses in time getting ready, he makes up for in werewolf parkour. He's alone in the elevator up, but when he steps out, there's Kyle. Jackson's wearing the blue suit Kyle might remember, from his first night, now tailored, rumpled and mended from the fight. It's one of his favorites. Designer and his from London. Not here. But, he cleans up good. )
For the record, I don't like being told to hurry. ( But that is even playful. He's contracted now, and according to Emma they get to have a relationship, should they want one, or to fool around, etc. In public, all they can do is the small kiss he presses to Kyle's lips, quick and greeting. )
Hey.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-10 04:12 am (UTC)[ Which is perhaps why he takes his time getting ready. There's been purchases of new clothes, both because he's accepting his life in this place and because every other week he swears something gets damaged either through work or the hell this place puts them through.
Carefully casual nonchalance takes him longer than he wants it to, ignoring how much time he's putting into trying to look like he didn't take too much time getting ready, finally settling on a black silk sweater with black slim trousers and a matching jacket.
Lighting up when he sees Jackson, chuckling at that reminder.]
If it helps, you are entirely worth any wait. Definitely worth it.
[Sliding his hand along Jackson's lapel as he leans into him for a moment, wanting to follow that kiss with another. Public. He reminds himself where they are, contract or not, and straightens his jacket as he looks Jackson over again.]
Hello yourself. Glad to have a chance to come up here.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-11 03:24 am (UTC)( He hasn't always been the worth the wait, but you can bet he's always believed himself to be. He'd kiss Kyle again, but they're still getting used to - well, he's getting used to his new normal. )
What are we doing but, taking the chances we have.
( Which is weirdly philosophical but, either way, he turns toward the bar. )
Do you want to sit at the bar or a table.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-13 05:43 am (UTC)[He can't help himself, his fingers lightly brushing against Jackson's hand. The temptation is there to pull him close, wanting to kiss him again, but the constant concern of being sanctioned for their relationship holds him in check.
Even if he does sway towards Jackson.]
Actually something I feel I'm definitely learning here. To take the chances I have no matter what I'm risking.
[It's why he's there. Because the chance to see Jackson, to have what amounts to a date with him in public in this place, it's worth the risks.
Even the teasing ones from the their texts]
A table. I feel safe by the rail with you.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-16 04:50 pm (UTC)( He bites the air quickly and playfully, but, steps back. Maybe when he shares his news they can act a bit differently. A bit more intimately. )
You're right to. I'll throw someone else overboard. Maybe if they get the temperature of my steak wrong. ( He smirks. ) Let's take our seats. The sooner we sit, the sooner we order. And - we both have news.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-17 05:53 pm (UTC)[And he loves it, unable to stop smiling because the one weight that had been on his shoulders since he came to this place is finally eased. Not complete though, not when he's still worrying about Jackson.]
Well here's hoping they're on their game tonight. Be a shame to ruin a good night having to deal with the guards.
[Though he's not even sure they would. How does that work here? Would they answer to the guards or just to the dom of the person? Nope, not thoughts he wants to have right now.
His hand brushes Jackson's, finding himself in that mental place where he really just wants any contact with him, those same emotions that had been chaotic and desired since they met roiling up within Kyle once more.
Resisting the urge to take Jackson's hand even as he brushes past him with more contact than needed and heading for their table.]
no subject
Date: 2020-01-22 01:56 am (UTC)Guards lead to being realigned, or the People Zoo. Let's avoid consequences. At least for tonight. Leaves something to look forward to tomorrow.
( The guards could come up, or any other diner here could be a plainclothes guard. Jackson follows after Kyle, feeling that small surge in their mutual touch. They reach one of the tables on the outdoor balcony, settling themselves down by the aforementioned railing.
Jackson waits for the submissive waiter nervously lists the specials and disappears before speaking. )
I know I'm intimidating, but this city takes it to another level. All because we're dominants.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-22 09:37 pm (UTC)Settling in at the rail, glad for the view even as he glances toward the submissive, listening though he finds himself distracted, wondering why the waiter acts that way. Was their dom cruel? Had they been punished too often. He tries to think about Margo acting that way and nearly chokes, covering his mouth with a cough.]
Wait, you're intimidating?
[Smiling though as he says it, glancing toward where the waiter went and back to Jackson.]
Seriously though, it makes you wonder. Though it's kind of why I wanted to see you. Well, one of the reasons why.
[After Jackson had come to his rescue, it made him realize he wanted to make more time for him, for those that he's becoming close to in this place, but definitely for Jackson.]
I'm contracted. It actually happened after you saved my ass from being an idiot. And it's not one of the cats.
no subject
Date: 2020-01-25 06:14 am (UTC)He perks an eyebrow up at that, the partial subject change and waits to here the news Kyle beat him to. )
Glad Andrew Lloyd Webber didn't sell his soul to you. ( Ethan and CATS, though. ) But, ( He takes Kyle's hand in his and then grasps it with his other hand. ) I'm happy you're contracted. I'm not - taking it lightly. It's important. Like - Like mine. Like me. I'm contracted, too. Way to be competitive.
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Date: 2020-01-26 09:53 pm (UTC)Smiling as his fingers curl around Jackson's, not having entirely thought about how much could change with these contracts, how much more leeway they have.
He laughs though at the competitive comment, shaking his head. ]
Not competitive. That's the best news I could have heard tonight. After the other day, I've worried about how things could end up for both of us so I'm glad we don't have to worry about that.
[At least for three months.]
So, who are they? Who am I being jealous of?
[Not that he looks the least bit worried about that. Not in the least.]
no subject
Date: 2020-01-28 02:31 am (UTC)They are Harry. They're a wizard. They're a he. ( For starters. ) He's prickly and skittish but he's not horrible to be around. He has a dark sense of humor and he went through a large-scale war. He's seen some shit. ( So have they all. ) Octavia's looking for a place and I'm helping. It's got me thinking - I might look for one, too. So I can put Harry up, take him out of the Down.
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Date: 2020-01-30 02:15 am (UTC)It's an odd sensation realizing that he can feel as he does about Jackson and not worry about this place, the other people in his life.
He nods when Jackson talks about moving.]
If he's been through that much, might be best for him. Give him a place that he can feel secure. Might be good for you too.
[He hadn't thought about it himself, though now he's realizing he should talk to Margo about it.]
Want a laugh? Margo's a magician. I mean, I assume by wizard you mean about the same thing.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-02 02:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-03 06:05 pm (UTC)From the things she's told me and I've seen? More like manifest rabbits out of nothing and walks between worlds. So thinking more like Merlin.
Except way younger and better dressed.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-07 03:40 am (UTC)( Don't answer that. )
So. We're both contracted, and to people who use magic. Without telling each other. We find each other our first day. Is this something special, Valenti? You and me?
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Date: 2020-02-08 06:40 pm (UTC)[There's a nervousness that leaves Kyle hesitating in answer that right away. They've talked around this a time or two, and he is never sure how far he should go in admitting he thoughts on it. On them. If there's one thing he's been gaining in his time in Duplicity it's not letting himself be held back. Even if he's still working himself to death.]
Honestly? I think so. I have for months now. This just confirms it for me. Not that you need me to tell you that you're special, but you're special to me.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-09 05:51 am (UTC)( It's not really a proclivity he has.
Jackson doesn't know quite how he feels. He can argue and see that the both of them have coincidences in spades - or not. They have always gotten along. He likes boning Kyle, and he likes being around Kyle. But, is it betraying Ethan if Ethan isn't there. He doesn't know. )
Months. Really. Played it close to the vest.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-09 11:57 pm (UTC)[He raises his hands in what amounts more of less to surrender, trying to consider how to word this. ]
The sex is great, that's without saying but it's more than that for me and has been. I like the time we spend together, and... Hell, I even worried about how much there would be with your move because see you is important to me.
[It's been so long since he's had these kind of thoughts and feelings, he's not even sure how to word it. Especially given he knows things are different for Jackson. Their anniversary of the day they met is his anniversary as well.]
no subject
Date: 2020-02-11 02:02 am (UTC)( It may not be what Kyle wants to here. It may not be elaborate. But, Jackson listens, really listens. He sucks in a breath and takes Kyle's hand again, squeezing it. )
You're important to me too, Kyle.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-13 01:35 am (UTC)That's all that matters then. We can figure out the rest as we go.
un: o.blake
Date: 2020-01-29 04:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-01-30 01:38 am (UTC)That depends on your definition of okay because the city did screw with me. For the second time it looks like. So. You know me, then?
text; un: bigstar
Date: 2020-02-04 04:18 am (UTC)Wildest sex act that you haven't mentioned.
So no 🚹 🍆 💦 again.
Mine would be ⛪ 🙏 🍆💦🍆💦
no subject
Date: 2020-02-05 05:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-07 05:13 am (UTC)A sexy head massage led to all of that?
no subject
Date: 2020-02-07 05:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-08 03:38 am (UTC)My my and here I thought the kinkiest you got was fucking people outside.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-09 05:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-19 04:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 04:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 03:45 am (UTC)I'm not just anyone. Share your deep, dark secrets.
Why can't we discover it together?
no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 04:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 04:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 04:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 04:50 am (UTC)I thought you'd never ask.
So, we should do this soon.
Tonight? Tomorrow?
no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 04:53 am (UTC)Tomorrow. Do you climb?
no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 05:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 05:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 05:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-25 05:34 am (UTC)Clothing optional climbing
But, a harness... Can't be comfortable. Like that.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 03:34 am (UTC)I'll come, clothing on, and watch you climb.
Hold your rope or whatever.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 05:28 am (UTC)un: swan
Date: 2020-02-19 04:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 04:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-24 04:01 am (UTC)It's a bat signal.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 05:27 am (UTC)I'll check with Lady Blake.
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Date: 2020-02-28 06:13 am (UTC)She's Bellamy's sister, she doesn't have a choice.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-28 06:47 am (UTC)Shockingly, she's also in. Give us 20?